Platformers are the most diabolical gaming genre. I should know

Having abandoned them entirely in a fit of fury in the late 90s, I recently made a return to platform games. How long before the rage takes over?

There are only two video games my wife has ever enjoyed: Mario Kart, in which she has gleefully brought up the rear for the entirety of our family life; and Crash Bandicoot, of which she was, at one stage, the greatest player in the world.

She completed every molecule of every Crash game in the 90s. I swear I saw her get 105% on one of them, but this being the 90s, I have filed that memory under “things I may have hallucinated in an altered state”, along with Gary McAllister missing that penalty at Wembley, and the band Menswear.